Second dance.

I went to another dance class on Thursday. It was from a different teacher, her name was Jackie. She's prego, like my old dance coach in Oregon, whose baby I will not be there to see when it comes into the world :(

Anyways, the class was not nearly as challenging as the one I took from Sue. I'm way out of shape so the conditioning was hard, but as far as the combinations we did and the across the floor, it wasn't that challenging at all. My mom was like hon that didn't look challenging at all and she thinks it's not gonna be enough for me. Most the kids in the class were in middle school... nuf said. There was one girl my age, but she wasn't even one of the best in the class. The best in the class were in middle school. They had better technique than me (sad, I know) because I haven't actually been enrolled in legit studio classes since the summer before my freshman year (forever ago) so my technique is extremely lacking. I gained some back during the dance team days just from excercising it alot, but it hasn't grown as it needs to. Even since I left dance team when we moved, I've lost a ton of muscle mass. I just realized one day that my legs were so much weaker. I definitely realized that the day after Sue's class when I was soar. Not too soar, but soar enough that I knew I was in trouble if I didn't enroll soon.

So, I am now officially enrolled at the dance studio of fresno. I'm only taking two classes a week right now (cuz were dirt poor right now since my dad's business hasnt started yet so there is not a single source of income for our family right now. completely living off savings which there is not much of.). But I will be taking a monday class from Sue, and a thursday class from Jackie. I think I might also try Martha's class this week or next week just to try it (she was Mia Michaels assistant, so heeello that interests me..) and if I'm not completely over my head then I will add that on to my schedule once we have the money. Or if Jackie's end up being just not challenging at all and doesn't keep my attention, then I'll switch into Martha's and just have two extremely challenging classes a week. Either way, I will improve, I will get in shape, and I will be amazing.

Speaking of getting in shape, once I lose the first 10 pounds my mom is going to pay me 5 dollars for every pound I lose. Cuz lets face it, I've gotten way out of shape. It's been slowly getting out of hand since middle school, and now if I don't suck it up and make big changes, I'll be for realz way overweight by college. And I don't want that. Like I've been wanting to make a change its just hard when you're not the one buying the groceries, and if you know anything about my relationship with my parents you know that I'm definitely not one to tell them anything about my problems or make myself vulnerable to them. I would rather die than do that. But I guess now I have to since my mom came into my room last night and started giving me a serious lecture about my weight. "It's gotten to the point that you're dad gets mad at me for feeding you," she said.
Ouch.

It's for the best. I didnt' respond to her, I barely said a word the whole time she sat there and talked because I was trying not to cry. I practically ignored her and couldn't look her in the eye and just sat fiddling on the computer even though I was doing nothing. But I'll do it. Just not talk to them about it. Thank God my dad got our treadmill up and working (I guarantee he did it due to wanting me to not be his slowly-gaining little girl anymore).
Next time all the eugene kids see me, 30 pounds=gone.

And I will be $150 dollars richer for it.

Even without the money I'd do it, but hey, why not take the money?